day 15,010: this is a test

My brother, of course, was already blogging almost twenty years ago. That’s a little annoying.

 

In fairness to myself and to him in general, he probably started his blog the easiest way possible (which means whatever way he found that felt like the least waste of his time). If I was less stubborn, I would have gone that way, too. At least two weeks ago.

 

But I’m not. And I didn’t. And if we do anything akin to laughing after we’re dead, my brother is doing that right now.

 

Because he is dead. And also sarcastic (if we are anything akin to that after we die). But mostly full of doting and playfulness.

 

Photo of my brother in NY
My brother, as I imagine him most often. A little smug. A little annoyed. A whole lot brilliant and beautiful.

There will be plenty of time for me to wax celestial about my thoughts on death and post-death and all the things before and in between. Today though, my day 15,010, day three of my year-long meditation on life, family, purpose, time, and (please, please) significantly less serious things… I am just doing this first thing first, which is to create the space where all the rest of that can be possible.


Because that is what I do. I make things. And I often make them way more difficult than they probably need to be. But once they are done, I am almost always, nearly, mostly certain that they are and were completely worth it.


This is how I am grieving, honoring, and living you forward, brother. I am glad now that you were so intolerant of wasted time. And while I am annoyed it has taken so long to get these first words out onto the digital page, it’s been worth it.

 

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